ONWARDS

For the past decade of my life, I’ve tried to craft this perfect image of a cool, stoic, black and white photographer. Ugh, just typing it out makes me want to puke. The reasoning behind it all was because I thought I needed to present myself in that manner in order to get work and build a good reputation. After all, many of the photographers I’ve looked up to seem to project this sort of mystical aura. They almost seem like gods who can create masterpiece after masterpiece, and here I am, just struggling to pull together a shoot, yet still trying to make it look like it’s all so easy. 

It’s not.

There are, in fact, many minor inconveniences about photography. You need to find the right subject. If you are shooting outdoors you need to hope and pray the weather is good. Before that, you need to find a location. And if you are going to shoot in a studio instead, well, you’re going to have to pay, and it can get quite expensive. People cancel last minute. And even if everything lines up, you might not be able to develop any chemistry with your subject to come up with good work. Lastly, some clients don’t pay. I remember all of them. 

But still, I’ve persisted with this cool… calm image. 

It’s fake. 

At least, I think my intentions are real. No, my intentions are very real. I have absolutely no other desire but to create raw, honest, and timeless work. Outside of the basic well-being of myself and those around me, that’s all I really want to do in my life. I just want to create, and I want to create at the highest level possible. And I guess, I’m coming to the realization that continuing as this cool calm black and white figure that I’ve created for myself is not the way.

The way forward is to continue as authentically me as possible, and that means not limiting myself to an image crafted by a younger, more naive version of me. 

I need to grow.

Seems to be the case, huh? No matter how much you learn, how much you grow, and how many damn lessons life has thrown at you. There’s still more. 

So much more. 

Moving forward, I will continue creating from the truest parts of me. I will not limit myself to this image I’ve crafted. I will let life be a little more messy. I will let my authenticity express its full self, and accept it in every form that it takes.

Onwards.

by Jason Lam

EVERYBODY HAS AN OPINION

Everybody has an opinion

But not everybody creates

Your job is to create

Let everybody else decide whether they like it or not

by Jason Lam

YOUR WAY, IS THE WAY

For most of my artistic career, I always felt like there was something I was missing.

A secret.

A technique I have yet to learn to get me the phenomenal results that would set me apart from everyone else in the world.

But then I reached a point where I had to acknowledge the fact that perhaps I wasn’t missing anything.

That my way was the way.

And that was when I set myself free.

To create whatever I wanted, however I wanted.

by Jason Lam

TO BE WITH YOU

To be with you is like drinking coffee on a foggy day

Like finding a twenty-dollar bill under the couch

Like getting a venti vanilla frappuccino, when you only ordered a grande

To be with you it almost feels like it’s Sunday, but every day

Sunshine,

A perfectly toasted ham and cheese croissant,

And the softest patch of grass I’ve ever laid on in my life

To be with you is like seeing a new leaf sprouting out of my monstera

Like kissing a frog… wait—

Like kissing…

Just kissing!

You know, those soft sensual kisses that are just the right amount of pressure

Like, not too much, but not too little either

And maybe just the right amount of chapstick leftover, in case your lips are also hella chap too

Cause that’s always a little bit gross

What was I talking about?

Oh yeah, to be with you is like meeting you for the first time every time—

Man, that’s hella cheesy  

To be with you

To be with you…

I just like to be with you

by Jason Lam

BE YOU AND OWN IT

“Be you and own it”

This was a piece of advice I received about five years ago.

To this day, I still think back to it because I feel there’s a part of me that still hasn’t fully integrated what this piece of advice has to offer.

"Be you," I think I have that part down.

Owning it?

That’s a whole different animal.

That means to be proud. To stick your neck out. To put your name on the line. And not only to just shine a light but to keep shining despite the haters trying to put you out.

This isn’t easy. No wonder I haven’t owned it.

I noticed I still take the safe route.

Like there’s a deep part in me that says, "Don’t put yourself on the line. Create a brand and come up with a fancy logo, people will love it!"

But really it’s just a dinky little costume I don in the hopes that people will like me better without having to expose too many parts of myself.

I need to be me. I need to own it.

by Jason Lam

1 SECOND EVERYDAY - 2020

Traveled to Laos, Cambodia, and Vietnam for the first time. Hopped on over to Japan for a bit. Covid-19 took over the world. Stayed safe in Taiwan. Taught myself some music production. Learned how to surf and free dive! Made a ton of new friends. Got really homesick, but can’t complain. I am alive, healthy, and well.

Happy New Year!

by Jason Lam