• Design
  • Photo
  • Video
  • _
  • About
  • Shop
  • Menu

Jason Lam

  • Design
  • Photo
  • Video
  • _
  • About
  • Shop
Jason Lam

A BETTER WAY TO STAY IN TOUCH

Added on April 13, 2016 by Jason Lam.

Staying in touch can be difficult. Sometimes we want to reach out those we rarely speak to but care deeply about beyond typical holidays like Christmas and birthdays. But how do you do that without appearing a little cheesy? Random? Weird? Or at worst, sounding like you want to get something out of them when you really just wanted to say hi and let them know you’re thinking of them?

Solution:

Send something useful.

This could be an interesting article, a unique object, a cool event, a fun fact, or a picture that you know the receiver will appreciate.

Why This Works:

Utility. A look at anyone’s everyday life will present a universal pattern. We all want to be happy, but it’s not that simple. Sending along a useful tidbit of anything that helps them ease pain, solve problems and live better is always greatly appreciated.

Clarity. When you reach out to someone you don’t normally keep in touch with, they’ll be met with a bunch of questions: Why are you calling me? Why now? What do you want? It’s confusing. People don’t like that. Avoid the uncertainty and get straight to your point. Thought you’d find this interesting + thinking of you + P.S. don’t forget me!

Appreciation. Sending an item you know they like is an indirect way of saying I like you just the way you are. This will make you stand out in a world where we’re constantly made to feel less of ourselves due to the things we lack or the way we look. By sending something that aligns with their interests, you encourage them to continue being who they are and to keep kicking ass. Who wouldn’t want that?

Special. We’re individuals of self-interest. We’re constantly asking ourselves, “What’s in it for me?” And if we can’t find an immediate answer, we’d rather focus our attention on something else. Sure, you’re the one who wants to reach out to your loved ones, but don’t make it about you, make it about them. When you shine the spotlight on others, the spotlight shines back at you.

I read a lot, I also love checking out local events and exploring the city. Whenever I come across something that makes me think of someone, I send it to them immediately. No expectations. No second thoughts. It’s become a habit of mine and it’s a nice and easy way of keeping in touch.

A few examples:

  • My brother loves video games, so I sent him this website with all the original Nintendo games

  • My friend Zach loves cycling, so I sent him this cool video of an invisible helmet

  • My boss Laurent was trying to come up with a name for his new company, so I sent him this naming book

Recently, I created a monthly newsletter I send out to my friends just to tell them what I’ve been up to and to share a few things I think they’d find interesting. You’re welcome to join the newsletter at the sidebar on the right.

Next time you reach out to someone you haven’t spoken to for a long time, take an extra second to come up with a little extra something you know they’d appreciate. When you do so, you position yourself as someone who adds value, and you’ll be delighted to find that your kindness will encourage others to keep in touch with you as well.

In short, give and expect nothing in return.

by Jason Lam

← Newer: SPARK JOY: HOW MARIE KONDO CHANGED MY LIFE Older: HOW TO BE A BETTER TEACHER →

Jason Lam (@jasonlammm) 

I’m a multidisciplinary artist 
Read More →

 New York, NY


Join My Newsletter

A monthly newsletter helping you be productive, feel inspired, and create amazing work:

Thank you!

View the latest issue & archive →


Popular Posts

Featured
0077_10A-2.jpg
THE 3 STAGES OF CREATIVITY
3620_20.jpg
5 EXERCISES TO CREATE A VISION FOR YOUR LIFE
10 LIFE LESSONS I LEARNED FROM WATCHING INITIAL-D
10 LIFE LESSONS I LEARNED FROM WATCHING INITIAL-D
Negative0-00-26-2.jpg
ADMITTING YOU'RE LOST
7E2F0868-839B-4627-9C5E-D9B751802118.JPG
3 REASONS WHY YOU SHOULD "JUST DO IT"
HOW DO YOU DEFINE YOURSELF AS A PHOTOGRAPHER?
THAT TIME I GOT KICKED OUT OF UCLA
THAT TIME I GOT KICKED OUT OF UCLA
HOW YOUR ART CAN SET YOU FREE
I HOPE YOU FIND CLARITY
I HOPE YOU FIND CLARITY
THIS IS WHY YOU MISS YOUR CRAZY EX-GIRLFRIEND
THIS IS WHY YOU MISS YOUR CRAZY EX-GIRLFRIEND

Archive

  • Creativity 128
  • Culture 29
  • Entrepreneur 9
  • Health & Wellness 3
  • Home 2
  • Life Choices 238
  • New Work 4
  • Photography 68
  • Poem 34
  • Popular 12
  • Relationships 5
  • Travel 46
  • Video 13
  • Writing 12

Terms Privacy

Back to Top